I did it. I successfully completed my first derby season! (True, I only got to skate in 3/5 games, but still) No injuries yet, *knock knock* and I'm slowwwwwly improving every time.
It's amazing how sick to my stomach and terrified I was yesterday, and totally convinced I didn't want to go out there. I don't know what it is - the crowds? The pressure? My team was last place going in and playing a team we love, so pressure was nonexistent. I guess it was because I (naturally) got picked out as the weak member of the herd and was successfully held back by 3 players of the opposing team more than once. Oh well. My family says I got up quicker than ever when knocked down! AND even resisted falling down when hit a few times! AND - gasp - successfully kept one of our league's best jammers back for more than a few seconds!
That smells like progress.
Now I'm super excited to just go to practice and work on my skills without having to perform in front of a live audience once a month! Bring on the summer season!