A Smarter House in Prague

I’ll have a buncha thoughts about Prague (because Prague … FUCK YEAH!) Never been here before! Ignorant as fuck! All I knew about this place going in was “it’s gorgeous and wasn’t blow’d up in any wars”. Cool, I’m in.

BRB, googling the history of the astronomical clock and Franz Ferdinand and all about why this place is so fucking amazing.

One of my favorite initial impressions so far is the “smart house” AirBNB we’re staying in. Among its many fine features (lack of light switches, a leaking shower that results in a deluge of water in the bathroom, aka NOT where to dry your hair) there is a giant glass cube that houses the toilet and the shower. You get to CHOOSE (yes, it’s your choice) whether you want to be seen or not seen when you’re washing your private bits and/or taking a shits.

I don’t know about y’all but I was raised as a repressed Catholic who never, EVERRRR went to the bathroom with the door open and just dealing with dear friends who are cool with that has been a struggle. Plus I live with a man who’s fine with all open doors all the time all bodily fluids. And thank god for that because now, here, when the automatic smart house curtain sllloooowly rolls back as I’m pooping, I know my husband delights in the hilariousness of it, and not my deep ingrained shame.

Plus this happened:

We hit the button for “intimate bedroom lighting” on the smart panel because duh, and the bedroom lights dimmed, but yet somehow the bedroom curtains FLEW OPEN, which resulted in my husband, butt ass naked, jumping behind the totally transparent bathroom cube, hand over his junk, as I hit all the wrong buttons to reverse the situation. Maybe in Prague it’s all about the voyeurist in us? I’m not judging. We were just in Amsterdam.

I laughed about this for long enough that he laughed about it.